Let’s prep for Prep, ’cause that makes sense!

Errone needs to chill out.

The lovely College Board has now come out with ReadiStep, a test designed for 8th Graders so that they can be more prepared to take the PSAT in high school (which, FYI, is a PREPARATORY TEST ITSELF). Giving 13 year olds a number that represents their ability to make it on the Standardized Test that will Determine Their Future does nothing except convince them early on that they won’t be able to do better than that. STOP TELLING PEOPLE HOW GOOD THEY ARE AND LET THEM BE BEES.

Full disclosure: I rocked my SATs. But if I had taken a similar test in 8th grade, I probably would have gotten comments like “she’s just not a test taker.” Why not focus on giving 8th graders the basic education they need so that they can then go on and hone their skillz without worrying about the fact that they have no idea what the periodic table is? Seriously guys, it’s hard to defend having an ace test taker if they can’t even define an adjective.

And how far is this going to go, anyway? In five years there will be a scholarship linked to ReadiStep, and so then there will be a Prep Test (FlashCardDance! RunningStart! BabiGenius!) for 5th graders, then 1st graders, and then moms at preschool will be all, “Well my Brooklyn didn’t need an instructor to get her 98% on the BabiGeniuses last year. She drew that straight line all on her own. We fully expect Harvard or at least a New Ivy in her future. What about your Arryn?” (Does anyone feel like as child/school culture becomes more ridiculous, parents are naming their babies to match?)

Also, why do the People Who Name Everything In The World insist that replacing “Y” with “I” will make a brand more appealing? Why would people preparing an academic test feel the need to spell “ready” wrong? Who wants to bet that on the spelling section, 37.43% more 8th graders will choose B) readi instead of A) ready?

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Filed under Culture Shock, School

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